Home Dating apps Polly’s hard truths: “My heart and my kidneys are linked!”

Polly’s hard truths: “My heart and my kidneys are linked!”


Scientific and medical types say that babies are often born without wisdom teeth now. Hooray for evolution!

Wisdom teeth are the worst.

As far as I can tell, the only purpose they have is to cause bouts of massive pain, make other teeth become crooked, and make dentists rich. There’s no need for those little bastards!
This obviously forced me to ponder the question: Are most women’s vaginas inextricably linked to the heart via a secret cord? And has evolution weakened that damn cord?
I have a cord. I know

I have a cord. I hear stories of women who can freely connect (cough!) with “lovers” (awful term) and then – boom! – move on to the next person (or people) with no feelings, no regrets and no need to practice writing his last name with each man he kisses.

Today we live in a world of apps that give us the ability to swipe left or right to meet a myriad of people. Within every dating app is an assortment of romantic or, let’s be honest, purely sexual opportunities.

Well, a varied variety of tasty starters, desserts and main courses anyway. Some look appetizing and some look like mom really did her best to make something out of the leftovers from the roast dinner. There are also a few plates of “baked catfish” disguised as sirloin steak.

I had a few application dates.

One even led to a relationship and several to solid friendships. But one thing I’ve learned over too many years of trial and error is that I was born with wisdom teeth.

Unfortunately, they didn’t provide any wisdom when it came to men, but I’m still one of those women who, once I have feelings, is a little dumb.

If I stop at a kiss and a hug, those feelings can fade pretty quickly, but if I get more intimate, like in kisses and hugs without clothes on, then my bottom heart sends a message to my heart. from the top that this person is “special”.

Immediately, my heart above believes my heart below, and all sorts of anguish and heartbreak can arise when I don’t get a Romeo reciting poetry and bringing flowers to my balcony, scary as that sounds.

So going back to my first question, are some of us born with the irritating love cord and some not? Am I just a psychopath who expects every man to fall in love with me once he’s “dined at my table”?

There is a cord. I know there are. And if I could, I’d like it linked, thanks. I don’t agree to have my tubes tied, but I will volunteer for the cord procedure. Perhaps I should mention that I discovered a few years ago that I had a heart-shaped uterus.

It’s a true story and maybe, just maybe, that explains everything.

Be sure to check out Polly’s new radio show starting at 8 p.m. weeknights on Today FM.